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50+ Long Jokes About Animals

Hey there, animal lover!

Are you ready for some serious giggles?

Do you want to hear some pun-derful jokes that will make you laugh until you snort?

Well, you’re in luck because we’ve got 50+ long jokes about animals that will tickle your funny bone in all the right ways.

From cows to cats, from snakes to sloths, we’ve got a joke for every creature on the planet.

So sit back, grab a snack, and let’s get ready to have a howling good time!

Long Jokes About Animals

Why did the turtle cross the road? To get to the shell station!

Why do cows wear bells? Because their horns don’t work!

Why did the lion break up with his girlfriend? Because she was a cheetah!

Why was the cat afraid of the tree? Because it was a tree-mendous tree!

Why do seagulls fly over the sea? Because if they flew over the bay, they’d be called bagels!

What do you get when you cross a snake and a pie? A python!

Why do elephants never use computers? Because they’re afraid of mice!

Why did the frog call his insurance company? He had a jump in his car!

What do you call a donkey with three legs? A wonkey!

What do you get when you cross a kangaroo and a sheep? A woolly jumper!

Why did the chicken go to the seance? To talk to the other side!

Why was the ant confused? Because all his uncles were ants!

Why did the dog take a shower? To get out of the dog-house!

Why don’t ducks pay for anything? Because they always quack up the bill!

What do you call a dog magician? A labracadabrador!

Why did the fisherman put a bell on his fishing rod? Because he wanted to catch the jingle-fish!

What do you get when you cross a sheep and a goat? A coat!

Why was the giraffe arrested? For stalking!

Why was the bee angry? Because he heard his buzz was going around!

Why did the worm go to the party? He wanted to boogie all night long!

Why did the elephant ask the octopus to play cards with him? Because he heard he was a great hand-shuffler.

Why don’t owls tell jokes? Because they think they’re too hoot-larious.

Why did the chicken cross the playground? To get to the other slide.

Why did the kangaroo stop hopping? Because he got tired of being a jump rope.

Why did the giraffe get a job as a telephone operator? Because she had a long neck for reaching the phone.

Why don’t cats play poker in the jungle? Because there are too many cheetahs.

What do you call a fish that wears a bow tie? Sofishticated.

Why did the deer go to the psychiatrist? Because he was suffering from antler-depression.

What do you get when you cross a snake and a pie? A hissing apple pie.

What is a frog’s favorite game? Leapfrog.

Why did the sheep go on strike? Because she wanted ewe-niversal suffrage.

What do you get when you cross a rhinoceros and a sheep? A woolly mammoth.

Why did the cow go to outer space? To see if the grass is greener on the moon.

Why do horses make bad dancers? Because they always have two left feet.

What do you get when you cross a rabbit and an elephant? A jumbo bunny hop.

Why did the wolf go to the dentist? Because he had a tooth that was howling.

What do you get when you cross a flamingo and a kangaroo? A bird that likes to jump on one leg.

Why don’t zebras use cell phones? They prefer to use a stripe-reader.

Why did the crab go to the gym? To work on his shell-f esteem.

What do you get when you cross a porcupine and a balloon? A pop-up pin cushion.

Why do zebras have stripes? Because they don’t want to be mistaken for horses with stripes painted on them.

What did the lion say when he saw the gazelle at the bar? I think I’ll have a bite to eat.

What do you get when you cross a parrot with a shark? A bird that can bite you from ten feet away.

Why did the elephant paint himself yellow? So he could hide in a banana tree.

What do you call a pig that does karate? A pork chop.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was dead.

What do you call a bear with no teeth? A gummy bear.

Why did the turkey join a band? Because he had a drumstick.

What do you get when you cross a sheep with a kangaroo? A woolly jumper.

Why did the chicken cross the playground? To get to the other slide.

What do you call a turtle that is missing a shell? Homeless.

What do you get when you cross an alligator with a bear? A furry toothpick.

Why did the camel wear a scarf? Because he was feeling a little hump-y.

What do you call a fish that doesn’t have any eyes? Fsh.

Why did the koala break up with her boyfriend? Because he was too eucalyptus.

Why did the duck cross the road? To prove he wasn’t a chicken.

What do you get when you mix a skunk and a bear? Winnie the P-eww!

Why did the horse go to the doctor? Because he was a little hoarse.

What do you call a snobbish criminal going down stairs? A condescending con descending.

Why did the housecat get a job? Because he wanted to make some scratch!

Up to You!

So there you have it, animal-lover.

50+ long jokes about your furry, scaly and feathered friends.

From the lion who went on a diet to the snake who went to the beach, you’ve laughed, groaned and chuckled your way through the animal kingdom.

Whether you’re a fan of jokes that are punny, clever or just plain silly, there’s something in this post for everyone.

So go forth and share your newfound animal humor with the world – just try not to make a horse laugh too hard.

Happy joking, my friend!

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