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50+ Jokes About University

Hey there, you studious scholar!

Are you ready to take a break from the books and have a good laugh?

We’ve got just the thing for you – 50+ hilarious jokes about university that will leave you rolling on the floor (and maybe even procrastinating just a little longer).

Whether you’re a seasoned student or a bright-eyed freshman, these jokes are sure to hit home and tickle your funny bone.

So sit back, relax, and prepare to LOL at these witty, relatable, and downright hilarious jokes about university life.

Jokes About University

I used to be a terrible student, but then I realized I was just majoring in the wrong kind of beer.

Why is history the easiest major? Because you’re already a few centuries behind.

I’m so poor from paying tuition that I use ketchup as tomato sauce on my pasta.

Why did the physics major break up with his girlfriend? He couldn’t find the momentum to keep the relationship going.

How many college students does it take to change a light bulb? Three – one to change the bulb and the other two to Snapchat the process.

Why do business majors do so well in college? Because they have a lot of capital.

Why did the biology major refuse to dissect a frog? Because he was afraid it might croak under pressure.

Did you hear about the zombie who went to college? He finally enough got brains.

What do you call a history major who can’t find a job? A barista.

Why do engineers make the best burgers? Because they know how to apply the right force to the flattener.

Why did the music major refuse to sing I’ll Be There for You? It reminded her of her student loans.

What’s the difference between a philosophy major and a pizza? A pizza can feed a family of four.

Why did the English major refuse to read Moby Dick? Because she couldn’t handle the whale of a reading list.

If you’re feeling overwhelmed in college, just remember – it’s all Greek to me.

Why did the computer science major wear glasses? Because he couldn’t C#.

What do you call a college student who is always cold? An undergrad-chilla.

Why do art majors make such great pizza chefs? Because they know how to work with all the toppings.

What’s the difference between a college degree and a hot potato? One is valuable, the other is just a theory that will burn you.

Why did the economics major refuse to go on a date with his girlfriend? He couldn’t afford the opportunity cost.

Why do psychology majors make such good therapists? They’ve spent four years studying themselves.

Why did the computer go to college? To get a degree in screenshots!

Why did the physics major break up with the biology major? There was no chemistry.

What do you call a student who keeps talking in class? A teach-er’s worst nightmare!

Why did the English major cross the road? To get to the other syllabus.

Why did the philosophy major fail calculus? They couldn’t fill the logic gap.

What kind of grades do ghosts get in college? Mostly booses.

Did you hear about the math fanatic who went to university? He got a degree in sin and cosine.

What do you call a person who skips every college class? A debt-ist.

Why did the music major drop out of college? They got tired of playing musical chairs.

What do you call a group of college students procrastinating together? A study group.

Why did the history major fail out of college? They couldn’t make the past tense of the present tense.

Why did the art major go to college? To brush up on their skills.

What do you call a college student who loves to vacuum? A Dustbuster.

Why did the computer science major switch to marketing? They wanted to be an ad-dressable market.

What do you call a college student who’s always taking naps? A dorm-room mate.

Why did the psychology major become a philosopher? They were always questioning their own existence.

What do you call a college student who’s always wearing a hat and sunglasses? A grad-you-ate.

Why did the astronomy major go on vacation? To learn about the sun on a whole new level.

Why did the online learner miss their final quiz? The internet down-age.

What do you call a college student who’s in love with their professor? An office hour.

Why did the physics major break up with the biology major? They had no chemistry.

Why did the professor bring a ladder to class? To reach new heights of knowledge.

What did the academic advisor say to the student who wanted to major in procrastination? I’ll get back to you on that one.

How many university students does it take to screw in a light bulb? Three. One to do it, and two to argue about whether or not the light bulb was even a relevant metaphor for their studies.

What did the philosophy professor say when she walked into an empty lecture hall? If a tree falls in the forest and no one is around to hear it, does a lecture really happen?

What’s the difference between a grad student and a pizza? A pizza can feed a family of four.

What’s the difference between a college professor and a mad scientist? We’re not sure, but we’re pretty sure both have experimented on grad students.

Why did the engineering major wear glasses to the exam? To look more focused.

What do you call a student who changes their major six times in four years? A well-rounded individual.

Why did the liberal arts major cross the road? To get to the other side of the curriculum.

How many English majors does it take to screw in a light bulb? Two. One to screw it in, and the other to analyze the effects of light on the human psyche.

What do you get when you cross a math major with a philosophy major? An existential crisis.

Why did the history major get kicked out of the library? They were making too much noise with all of their second-hand sources.

What did the philosophy professor say when asked about the meaning of life? That’s an excellent question. Would you like to write a 40-page essay on it?

Why did the computer science major get banned from the library? They were downloading too many books illegally.

What do you call a bunch of law students hanging out together? A paradox.

What’s the difference between a psychology major and a bartender? A bartender knows when to cut someone off.

How many business majors does it take to solve a Rubik’s Cube? None. They’ll just outsource it.

Why did the communications major join the debate team? To practice talking to people who actually listen to them.

What do you call a university campus on a rainy day? A library.

Up to You!

Well, there you have it!

50+ hilarious jokes about university life that had you giggling, chuckling and maybe even snorting a few times.

Whether you’re currently a student or an alum, these jokes have definitely brought back some memories (even the embarrassing ones).

But hey, what’s university life without a few laughs, right?

So don’t take yourself too seriously and keep the jokes coming.

After all, laughter is the best medicine for those mid-term blues and all-nighters.

Cheers to the university life and all the shenanigans that come with it!

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