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50+ Jokes About Online Dating

Hey, you there!

Yes, you scrolling through your phone searching for your next online love connection.

We know you’re swiping left and right, trying to find that special someone.

But let’s take a break from the serious side of online dating and have a good laugh, shall we?

We’ve compiled a list of 50+ jokes about online dating that will have you LOLing and ROFLing.

From terrible pick-up lines to relatable dating woes, get ready for some much-needed comic relief in the world of online dating.

So put down your phone and buckle up, because this post is going to be a wild ride!

Jokes About Online Dating

Why did the computer start dating? Because it had a micro-chip on its shoulder.

Why did the octopus go on a date online? He was looking for someone with eight tentacles.

How did the dating website get so good at math? It was always calculating the perfect match.

What do you get when you cross an online dater with a catfish? A disaster.

Why don’t computers use online dating websites? They prefer to have a motherboard that understands them.

What do you call a man who’s good at online dating? A swipe-right.

How did the online dater find the love of his life? By using his search engine!

Why did the online dater refuse to go on a second date with the website? He found it too impersonal.

Why do people sign up for online dating? Because it’s cheaper than hiring a personal matchmaker.

What do you call a group of people who all met their partners online? A virtual wedding party.

Why do vampires love online dating? They can get all the blood they need with just a swipe right.

Why did the online dater cross the road? To get to the other match.

What do you call an online dater who only goes for people with the same first name? A name snob.

Why do ghosts use online dating websites? They’re looking for someone who won’t ghost them.

What did the online dater say when he found the perfect match? I’ve been swiping for this moment my entire life!

Why did the online dater refuse to date anyone who lived more than five miles away? Because he didn’t want to risk getting catfished.

What do you call an online dating profile with only one photo? A single snapshot.

Why did the online dater delete his account? Because he realized he was talking to himself.

Why did the online dater fall in love with the chatbot? Because it was programmed to say all the right things.

What do you call an online dater who never actually meets anyone in person? A virtual coward.

Why is online dating like a game of musical chairs? Because everyone’s aiming for a good seat.

I was going to sign up for an online dating service, but I couldn’t decide which username to use – so I stayed single.

I asked my online date to meet me at the gym. She didn’t show up. That’s when I knew we weren’t going to work out.

Why did the online dater refuse to swipe right on the lumberjack? Because his profile said he was a “sapiosexual”… and she didn’t have an axe to grind.

They say online dating is just a numbers game. That explains why my inbox keeps telling me to try a different combination of digits.

I’ve tried online dating before, but I always get matched with guys who are “good with their hands”. I’m just not into carpenters, okay?

Online dating is like window shopping. You’re just scrolling through hundreds of people, trying to find the one thing you’re looking for. Which is… loneliness?

I met my last Tinder date at a ‘cats and dogs’ charity event. We both had a lot of ‘ruff’ times before we found each other.

After months of online dating, I realized the only thing I was actually good at was writing catchy one-liners for my profile. Unfortunately, they attracted all the wrong people.

They say online dating is full of catfish. But I’m more worried about the piranhas – they’ll eat you alive if you’re not careful!

Online dating is just speed dating for people who don’t like leaving their house.

My last online date asked me if I was religious. When I said no, she said she couldn’t date someone who didn’t have a god in their life. That’s fine – I don’t think I could date someone who didn’t have a sense of humor.

I’m a software engineer, so naturally I joined an online dating site for other engineers. But all the girls there were already taken. They ran out of IP addresses.

Online dating is great – you get to filter out all the people who you don’t want to meet in real life. Or, as I like to call it, “The Bachelor, but with fewer roses”.

They say that online dating is the best way to meet someone these days. I guess that explains why They are always encouraging me to swipe right on myself.

After my first online date, I realized that my profile picture was outdated. It was from when I was still a blonde. Now I’m a ginger.

I’ve tried online dating multiple times, and each time I’m reminded of how much of a minefield it is. If you’re not careful, you’ll end up in the friendzone while simultaneously blocking them on every app.

I’m not sure if I believe in online dating. I mean, how can you really get to know someone from a few lines of text and a photo? But then again, I’m a language model who has no concept of romantic connection.

I matched with someone on Bumble who said she was a vegetarian. I’m not a vegetarian, but I’m considering changing my diet so I can say I’m a “plant-based match”.

Online dating has been great for my self-esteem. It’s nice to know that there are hundreds of people out there who are just as single and desperate as I am.

Why did the girl block the guy she met on an online dating site? Because he was a complete online catfish!

What did the guy call the girl he met on an online dating site? His Wi-Fi Catcher!

How do you know if someone is lying about their age on an online dating profile? Their profile picture is in black and white!

What do you call someone who is hooked on online dating? An All-night Internet Surfer!

Why did the guy stop online dating? He ran out of online pick-up lines!

What do you get when you cross an online date with a used car salesman? A not-so-attractive offer!

How can you tell if someone is a serial online dater? Their social media profiles are always connected to countless dating apps!

What did the girl say when she saw her online date in person? I think I need a stronger Wi-Fi signal!

Why is online dating like a game of chess? You have to make the right move to get the perfect match!

What did the guy say when he found out his online date had a cat? I guess I’m more of a dog person!

Why is it a bad idea to take a selfie for your online dating profile pic? Because it will always come out as a catfish!

What do you call a bad online dating experience? An E-pic Fail!

Why did the girl stop online dating? Because she couldn’t handle the constant swipe right motion!

How do you know if someone on an online dating app is serious about a relationship? Their profile says I’m not here for hookups!

Why is online dating like a stock market investment? Sometimes it pays off, other times you’re left with a loss!

What do you call someone who spends all their time on online dating sites? A Virtual Love Junkie!

Why did the guy delete his online dating profile? He found love in real life!

What do you get when you cross a dating app with social media? A recipe for disaster!

Why is it a good idea to be cautious while online dating? Because you never know who’s on the other side of the screen!

What did the girl say when she realized her online date was a no-show? I guess I didn’t have enough bars to make it happen!

Up to You!

Well, well, well – you made it to the end!

Congratulations on scrolling through 50+ jokes about online dating.

We hope you had a good laugh and maybe even identified with a few of these punchlines.

If there’s one thing we can agree on, it’s that searching for love or companionship on a dating app can be a wild ride.

But hey, at least you’ll have some jokes to tell your next match, right?

Happy swiping!

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