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50+ Jokes About Oil

Hey there oil enthusiast!

Are you ready to fuel up with some good laughs?

Look no further, because we’ve got 50+ hilarious jokes about oil that will make you shake your dipstick in laughter.

Whether you’re a mechanic, a petroleum engineer, or just someone who really loves their motor oil, these jokes are sure to get your engine revving.

So grab a can of WD-40, oil up your funny bone, and let’s get this joke-oil change started!

Jokes About Oil

Why did the oil go to the gym? To become a diesel pump!

What do you get when you mix oil with water? A slippery situation!

How does an oil rig greet its friends? With a crude oil handshake!

Why did the oil rig win an award? Because it drilled the best hole!

What do you call an oil spill in a library? A slippery page-turner!

How do you know if oil is not being transparent? When it refuses to admit it’s a grease ball!

Why did the oil go to the doctor? Because it was feeling too refined!

Why was the oil so hot? Because it was fracked!

What do you get when you cross an oil well with a prizefighter? The crudest heavyweight in the world!

Why did the oil drop out of school? Because it ran out of gas!

How do you make oil say pretty please? Add some crude oil to it!

Why did the oil rig operator go to the dentist? He had a cavity in his drilling!

What did the oil say to the spark plug? Let’s fuel the fire!

Why did the oil rig team throw a party? Because they found the most crude oil in the industry!

How do you get a good deal on oil? You have to really drill down to it!

What did one oil barrel say to another oil barrel? Come over here and let’s have a barrel of laughs!

Why did the oil rig owner wear sunglasses? Because oil was his day job!

What did the oil tanker say to the pirate? You better get on board or I’ll run over your booty!

Why did the oil rig operator wear wool socks? They were all about drilling!

What do you get when you combine oil and vinegar? A slippery dressing!

Why did the oil refuse to go on a date? Because it already had too many wells!

Want to hear a crude joke? Oil I can say is it’s not refined.

How do you make holy oil? You bless it with a prayer and filter it through a priest.

Why did the oil rig break up with the ocean? Because it just couldn’t handle the waves anymore!

How does an oil spill party? With crude oil tunes!

I went to a museum dedicated to oil history – it was an enlightening experience!

Why did the oil cross the road? To get to the other crude!

What did the oil say when it was hit by a car? Oh, refined sugar!

I tried to make my own biodiesel, but it just ended up being a greasy mistake!

How do you make oil laugh? You tell it a gas joke!

Did you hear about the gas pump that broke up with its girlfriend? It just wasn’t pumping the right fuel!

Why did the oil drum quit its job? It just didn’t have the capacity anymore!

What do you call an oil rig worker who can’t swim? Oil be dammed!

Are you an oil derrick? Because you got me pumpin’!

Why did the oil tank cross the ocean? To get to the crude oil port!

What’s an oil rig’s favorite holiday? Labor Day!

Why did the oil tanker fail its math test? It just couldn’t handle all the barrels!

I don’t always tell oil jokes, but when I do, they’re slick!

How do you spot an oil tycoon in a crowd? Their pockets are always greasy!

What do you get when you cross an oil reservoir and a guitar? A Crude-o-Lay!

Why did the oil rig go to therapy? He had a lot of drilling problems.

Have you heard about the new oil diet? It’s a crude-oil based cleanse, but it’s extremely slick.

What do you call an oil spill that’s also a fashion statement? Crude oil slick.

Why did the oil baron get arrested? He was caught pumping and dumping.

I’m trying to make a joke about oil, but it’s not coming out refined.

Did you hear about the oil company that tried to change its name to Essential Oils? It didn’t go over well.

What do you call an oil spill that’s also a bad haircut? A slick do.

Why did the oil tanker cross the road? To get to the slippery side.

They say oil is thicker than water, but I don’t believe them. Have you ever tried putting olive oil in your car engine?

What do you call an oil executive with no personality? A crude dude.

Did you hear about the oil company that tried to market a line of oil-based perfumes? They called it Eau de Petroleum.

What do you call a barrel of oil that’s also a hip-hop artist? Lil Oily.

Why did the oil refinery throw a party? They wanted to get lit.

Did you hear about the oil company that tried to sponsor a vegan festival? They called it Can’t Believe It’s Not Crude.

What do you call an oil rig that’s also a fancy restaurant? A drilling and dining experience.

Why was the oil spill always so upset? It always felt like it was just pouring itself out.

What do you call an oil pump that’s also a pop star? Diplo Crude.

Did you hear about the oil company that started selling a line of artisanal oils? They called it The Crude Awakening.

What do you call a barrel of oil that’s also a superhero? Black Gold Man.

Why did the oil exec have a bad day at work? There was too much crude humor.

Up to You!

Well done, my friend!

You made it through all 50+ jokes about oil!

Whether you found them slick and hilarious, or crude and cheesy, we hope they put a smile on your face.

Remember, even when the world seems a little heavy, it’s important to keep laughing and keep things light.

After all, oil may run out, but a good sense of humor never does!

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