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50+ Jokes About Lying

Hey, you little liar!

What do you call a post that’s full of jokes about being deceitful?

Well, you don’t have to lie to yourself – it’s right here!

Get ready to laugh your pants off (wait, you’re not lying about that, are you?) as we present to you the funniest, wittiest and most relatable jokes about telling a fib.

Whether you’re a master manipulator or just can’t resist a little white lie, there’s something for everyone in this list.

So settle in and prepare to be entertained with 50+ jokes about lying that will have you bending the truth (but in the best possible way).

Jokes About Lying

I never lie, except when I’m asleep.

I have a good reason for lying, but I’m afraid it might be a lie too.

My dog’s bark is worse than his lie.

Don’t believe everything you see on TV, especially when I’m on it.

Why shouldn’t you trust someone who lies all the time? They’re probably telling the truth about that.

I was tempted to tell a lie, but the truth is much funnier.

You can always spot a liar by the way they tell the truth.

Who needs the truth when lies are so much more interesting? If you can’t tell a good lie, you might as well tell the truth.

I’m not lying, I’m just creatively using the truth.

If only Pinocchio’s nose grew every time he told a good joke.

I never tell a lie, except on Mondays, Wednesdays and Fridays.

I’m not lying, I’m just practicing my fiction skills.

Professional liars must have a hard time telling the truth.

Sometimes lying is the only way to tell the truth. I’d tell you a joke about lying, but I’m afraid you wouldn’t believe it.

If lying was an Olympic sport, I’d be a gold medalist.

I’m not lying, I’m just being creative with the facts.

Why tell the truth when lies are so much more fun? I’m not lying, I’m just emotionally flexible with the truth.

Why did the dishonest chicken cross the road? To get to the other side of the truth.

Why couldn’t the liar tell a good joke? Because their punchlines were always fibbing.

What does a compulsive liar do when they get caught? They fake it till they break it.

What do you call a liar who’s always exaggerating? A big fibber.

How do you know when a politician is lying? Their lips are moving.

What do you call a person who tells white lies all the time? A partial truther.

Why did Pinocchio start a blog? So he could keep his readers on a string of lies.

How do you catch a liar? You don’t – they’ll catch you first.

What’s the difference between a fib and a falsehood? About as much as the truth and a lie.

What do you call a dishonest tailor? A fabricator.

Why was the fibber always hot and sweaty? Because they were always stretching the truth.

How do you know when a person is lying about their profession? When they say they’re a lawyer but they don’t like to litigate.

What did the dishonest acrobat say when they fell? I swear, it was just an accidental-on-purpose trick.

How do you know when a person is lying about their marital status? When they say they’re divorced but still wear a wedding ring.

Why did the liar join the police force? So they could carry a false alarm.

What do you call a dishonest waiter? A menu fibster.

How do you know when a person is lying about their age? When they say their driver’s license is lying about their birth year.

Why did the dishonest nurse get fired? They were always giving patients the wrong diagnosis.

What do you call a liar who’s always in denial? A deceptionist.

Why don’t liars eat carrots? Because they’re afraid they’ll grow longer noses.

Why don’t politicians lie on television? Because they’d have to stand up straight.

Why did the liar slowly back away from the hot stove? Because his pants were on fire.

Why did the liar try to make his lie sound more realistic? To make the truth less plausible.

Why don’t liars ever win a game of poker? Because they keep bluffing and get caught.

Why did the liar tell a fib about the ocean? He wanted to see how many gullible fish would bite.

Why did the liar tell a tale about his own heroism? He wanted to make himself feel like a legend.

Why didn’t the liar go to school? He didn’t want to learn the truth.

Why do liars always get caught in a lie? Because truth is stranger than fiction.

Why did the liar try to sound convincing? He wanted to avoid suspicion and stay in the game.

Why did the liar tell a joke about honesty? He thought it would be a real knee-slapper.

Why did the liar exaggerate about his accomplishments? To inflate his ego and impress others.

What do you call a liar who can’t keep his story straight? A fibber-nacio.

What’s the difference between a liar and a politician? One gets caught more often, but both are masters of deception.

Why did the liar lie about his weight? He didn’t want anyone to know he’d been eating the whole cake.

What do you get when you cross a liar and a thief? A perjury heist.

Why don’t liars ever tell the truth? Because honesty is the best policy
 for everyone else.

Why did the liar say he was allergic to the truth? He wanted to avoid the truth pimple.

What’s the difference between Pinocchio and a politician? One has a conscience and the other speaks with his nose.

Why did the liar refuse to go to Santa’s workshop? He didn’t want to take a lie detector test.

Why did the liar exaggerate about his salary? He wanted to play up to the crowd.

Up to You!

Congratulations, you made it to the end of our list of 50+ jokes about lying!

You’re either a liar yourself or just really dedicated to finding quality humor.

Either way, we hope these jokes have provided you with some much-needed laughter and entertainment.

Remember, honesty is always the best policy…unless you’re trying to impress someone or get out of trouble.

But hey, we won’t judge you – we’re all guilty of telling a white lie or two.

In the words of comedian Will Rogers, “I never met a man I didn’t like, until I met a man who lied.” So let’s all strive to be truthful and honest, while also holding onto our sense of humor.

Because at the end of the day, sometimes a good joke is the only thing that can make the truth a little more bearable.

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