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50+ Jokes About Love And Relationships

Hey there lovebirds and singletons alike!

Do you ever feel like you need a good laugh to ease the pain of modern dating?

Fear not, because we’ve got 50+ jokes about love and relationships that are sure to tickle your funny bone.

Whether you’re happily coupled or swiping left and right, these jokes will have you giggling in no time.

So sit back, relax, and get ready to LOL at the hilarious realities of love and relationships.

Jokes About Love And Relationships

Why did the cross-eyed guy break up with his girlfriend? He never saw her coming.

My boyfriend and I met on the internet and had a long-distance relationship. We finally got married and I had to move to his city. I asked him what he liked the most about me and he said my broadband.

What do you call a fake noodle? An impasta. Just like some guys I’ve dated.

Why did the banana break up with the apple? Because he couldn’t get a-peel to her.

My girlfriend told me to go out and get something that makes her look sexy, so I got drunk.

What do you call a wife who can’t make decisions? Ask her husband.

Why did the guy break up with his cubicle mate? Because she was always putting him in awkward positions.

I don’t think I’ll be dating anyone with a pun for a last name. It’s just too much press pun.

A relationship is like a house, when a light bulb burns out, you don’t go and buy a new house, you fix the light bulb.

I told my wife she was drawing her eyebrows too high. She looked surprised.

Why do women like tall men? So they can wear high heels without looking like a skyscraper.

Why did the couple go to the gym? They wanted their relationship to get serious.

I asked my wife if I was the only one she had been with. She said yes, all the others were nines and tens.

What do you call someone who is not sure if they want to be in a relationship? Single-minded.

My ex-wife still misses me, but her aim is getting better.

Why did the robot break up with his robot partner? They had a hardware failure.

The first time I met my girlfriend, I knew she was the one I wanted to spend the rest of my week with.

What’s the difference between love and marriage? Love is blind, but marriage is an eye-opener.

Why did the mobile phone break up with its charger? It was getting an electric shock.

Why did the couple go to a seafood restaurant? Because they wanted to have a sole mate.

Why did the man break up with his invisible girlfriend? He just couldn’t see anything in their relationship.

How do you know if someone is a hopeless romantic? They invest in bubble wrap stocks.

Love is telling someone their hair extensions are showing.

My boyfriend and I met on the internet and started dating long distance. We don’t know why people say long distance relationships don’t work in the modern age, our fax machine is working perfectly fine.

Did you hear about the two antenna that got married? The wedding wasn’t much, but the reception was excellent!

Why did the man propose to his girlfriend using a diamond? Because he wanted to put a ring on it.

What’s the difference between a spouse and a lover? About 30 pounds.

Marriage is like a deck of cards. In the beginning, all you need are two hearts and a diamond. Then, you end up wishing you had a club and a spade.

Love is like a fart. If you have to force it, it’s probably shit.

Why did the man put his money into a love savings account? He hoped it would earn some interest.

What do you call a woman who loves small dicks? Micro-bater.

I once went on a date with a mime. He didn’t say much but he kissed me quiet well.

What’s the difference between a boyfriend and a husband? About 30 minutes.

Marriage is a partnership where one person is always right, and the other person is the husband.

What do you call a love that is never returned? Insanity.

What’s the quickest way to tell if someone is a vegetarian? Don’t worry, they’ll tell you.

Marriage is a three-ring circus: engagement ring, wedding ring, and suffering.

What did the grape say to the raisin? You’re really starting to wrinkle my feelings.

What’s the difference between love and herpes? Love doesn’t last forever.

I once dated a scientist, but he broke my heart. He just didn’t have enough chemistry.

Why did the boyfriend break up with his GPS? Because it always told him to take a U-turn.

I told my wife she was drawing her eyebrows too high. She looked surprised.

Why did the math book break up with the history book? Because it had too many problems.

Why did the couple break up on the putting green? Because she kept telling him he didn’t have enough drive.

I asked my wife what she wanted for our anniversary. She said, Nothing would make me happier than a diamond ring. So I got her nothing.

Why did the couple break up at the beach? Because she kept telling him to stop being a sand castle.

Why did the chef break up with his girlfriend? Because she couldn’t handle the heat.

Why isn’t marriage like a deck of cards? Because in marriage, the Joker always wins.

Why did the couple break up at the car wash? Because she kept telling him to wash her car, but he didn’t have enough soap.

Why did the couple break up at the buffet? Because she said he was too picky.

Why did the man break up with his computer? Because it kept crashing his love life.

Why did the couple break up on the dance floor? Because he kept stepping on her toes.

Why did the blonde break up with the football player? Because he kept trying to score.

Why did the sleazy couple break up? Because they couldn’t maintain a stable relationship.

Why did the couple break up in the forest? Because she kept calling him a lumberjack.

Why did the couple break up at the gym? Because she said he wasn’t lifting enough.

Why did the couple break up at the zoo? Because he kept monkeying around.

Why did the couple break up at the movie theater? Because he kept whispering sweet nothings, but she could barely hear him.

Why did the couple break up on a boat? Because he said they were going down together, but she thought he meant something else.

Why is love like pi? Because it goes on infinitely, but eventually you get to the end and realize it’s irrational.

Up to You!

Well, well, well, you made it to the end of our collection of 50+ love and relationship jokes!

You must be feeling so fulfilled, it’s almost like you’ve just finished a full course meal of laughter.

You’ve heard tales of love at first sight, but we hope it’s love at first joke.

And if you’re still searching for your soulmate, don’t worry, just keep laughing and maybe they’ll appear right in front of you – or right in the comments section (wink wink).

Thank you for joining us on this hilarious journey of love and relationships, remember to share the jokes with your friends and partners, and stay tuned for more funny content!

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