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50+ Jokes About Knights

Hey there pal, you ready to laugh until you can’t catch your breath?

Well then, grab your armor and saddle up because we’ve got 50+ hilarious jokes all about knights!

From brave and noble protectors of the realm to bumbling and incompetent wannabes, these jokes are sure to tickle your funny bone and leave you in stitches.

So, prepare yourself for a jousting match with your funny bone and get ready to ROFL with these knee-slapping jokes about knights!

Jokes About Knights

Why did the knight go to the dentist? To get his armor removed.

What do you call a knight who’s afraid of the dark? Sir Light-a-Lot.

Why don’t knights ever use elevators? They prefer to take the stairs to improve their lance.

How does a knight get his mail? By sending his squire to the post office.

What do you call a knight who has no armor? Sir Unprotected.

Why did the knight buy a new shield? Because his old one was rust-ty.

How did the knight propose to his girlfriend? He gave her his chain mail.

What do you call a knight who loves to dance? Sir Cha-Cha-Cha-Valier.

Why did the knight quit his jousting career? He was lance-tired.

How do you know if a knight is lying? His armor pants are on fire.

What do you call a knight who likes to recycle? Sir Reduce-a-Lot.

Why did the knight carry a bell with him everywhere he went? He was afraid someone might steal his coat of arms.

What do you get when you cross a knight with a potato? A knight-tater.

How do knights prefer their coffee? Castle-sized.

Why don’t knights ever run out of arrows? They always bring a quiver full.

What do you call a knight who’s always giving speeches? Sir Talks-a-Lot.

Why did the knight go to the bank? To get a lance.

What do you call a lazy knight? Sir Couch-a-Lot.

How do you know if a knight is feeling sick? He has a case of the black helmets.

What do you call a knight who works at a bakery? Sir Dough-a-Lot.

Why did the knight take his armor to the dry cleaners? Because it was getting rusty!

What do you call a knight who is afraid to fight? Sir Render

Why do knights wear armor? Because it makes them feel guarded!

Why was the knight unhappy when he won his jousting match? He felt lanced and found out he had missed his bed.

What did the knight say when he finished his Sudoku puzzle? Check, mate!

Why couldn’t the knight keep a secret? Because he always had a tale to tell.

Why did the knight need to get a new sword? Because the old one was getting dull.

What did the knight use to write his epic poem? A sword pen!

Why did the lady knight break up with her boyfriend? She wanted a knight in shining armor, not a knight in denim and a leather vest.

What do you call a knight who loves to party? Sir Celebrate-a-lot.

Why couldn’t the knight enter the castle? The gatekeeper said, Sorry, Sir, it’s gate locked.

Why did the knight bring a ladder into battle? So he could reach new heights!

How did the knight feel after getting a new suit of armor? Like he was knight and day different.

Why was the dragon afraid of the knight? Because he always had a lance in his pants.

What do you call a knight who sneaks in and out of castles? Sir Creep-a-lot.

Why did the knight ride into battle on a bicycle? Because his horse was a slowpoke!

What do you get when you cross a knight with a pumpkin? A jack-o’-lantern in shining armor.

Why did Sir Lancelot refuse to fight in the rain? Because he didn’t want to rust in peace.

What did the knight say when he finished his meal? Thank you, I’m stuffed to the plate armor!

Why did the knight break up with his girlfriend? She stole his heart, and he couldn’t retrieve it.

Why do knights always wear chainmail? To protect their dignity from getting pierced!

How do you know when a knight is hungry? He’ll start jousting at windmills!

What do you call a knight who’s always telling puns? Sir Laughs-a-Lot!

Why did the knight cross the road? To get to the other medieval!

Why did the knight take up gardening? He wanted to see his lance-skills!

How do you spot a knight at a coffee shop? He’s the one asking for a knight-cappy!

What do you call a knight who can’t swim? Sir Sinks-a-Lot!

Why did the knight commit a crime? He left his lancelot at the scene of the crime!

How do you know when a knight is nervous? He starts to rust in his armor!

Why did the knight end his battle early? He didn’t have the sword-arm to keep going!

What do you call a group of knights that stumbled upon a cannibal village? Gruesome Twosome!

How do you spot a knight on a budget? He wears an armor-only!

Why did the knight have to go to the chiropractor? He twisted his lower back while sitting on his horse!

How do you know when a knight is cold? When his armor starts to clink and clank!

Why did the knight become an artist? He wanted his armor to look good enough to hang on a wall!

How do you know when a knight is feeling ill? His armor starts to rust and tarnish!

What do you call a knight with a sense of humor? Sir Laugh-a-Lot!

Why did the knight go into politics? He wanted to joust-ify his people’s lives!

How can you tell a knight from a pirate? The knight has more armor than parrrrr!

What is the most difficult part of a knight’s suit of armor to clean? His shielded-shoulders!

Up to You!

Well, there you have it, dear reader – 50+ jokes about knights!

You’ve definitely proven yourself to be a true champion of humor and wit by making it all the way through.

Whether it’s a pun, a one-liner, or a silly story, these jokes are sure to make you laugh out loud and wear a smile as bright as a knight’s armor.

So saddle up and ride off into the sunset, knowing that you are now armed with enough jest to make even the bravest knight quiver with laughter.

Smite you later!

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