Welcome to the world of grad school, where sleep is a myth, caffeine is your best friend, and procrastination is a way of life.
With a never-ending sea of assignments, thesis deadlines, and research projects, sometimes all you can do is laugh – and that’s where we come in.
Get ready to chuckle your way through the ups and downs of grad school with our hand-picked collection of 50+ hilarious jokes.
From thesis nightmares to advisor horror stories, we’ve got it all covered.
So grab your favorite mug of coffee and get ready to LOL your way to graduation!
Table of Contents
Jokes About Grad School
Why did the grad student drop out of art school? They just couldn’t draw a conclusion.
How many grad students does it take to change a light bulb? Just one, but it may take them six years to do it.
Why did the grad student refuse to go to the gym? They had already done enough heavy lifting with their thesis.
What do you call a grad student who has finished their dissertation? Unemployed.
Why did the grad student cross the road? To get to the other side of the academic conference.
Why did the grad student go on a diet? They needed to specialize in their field of study.
What do you call a grad student with one semester left to go? A hopeful pessimist.
How do you know if a grad student is stressed out? They start citing their sources in casual conversation.
Why did the grad student get kicked out of the library? They were caught checking out too many books on procrastination.
What do you call an unemployed grad student? A professional procrastinator.
Why do grad students love acronyms? They’re like a shortcut to a word count.
Why did the grad student bring a shovel to their dissertation defense? They needed to dig themselves out of a hole.
How do you measure the success of a grad student? By the thickness of their thesis.
What’s a grad student’s favorite drink? Coffee, because it helps them stay up and analyze data until the wee hours of the morning.
Why did the grad student fail their statistics class? They just couldn’t handle the standard deviation.
What do you call grad students who form a band? The Scholarly Hipsters.
Why did the grad student switch to studying environmental science? They realized they could recycle their research proposals.
How many grad students does it take to change a hypothesis? Two. One to change it and another to argue that it was better the way it was before.
Why did the grad student avoid reading the comments section of their thesis? They didn’t want anyone to critique their writing any further.
What’s a grad student’s favorite part of college life? When they finally get to use that fancy word they learned in a high-level seminar, even if no one else understands it.
Why did the grad student refuse to solve more math problems? He reached his thesis statement.
What’s the difference between a grad student and a rose? A rose has thorns on the outside while a grad student has them on the inside.
Why did the grad student always wear glasses? He couldn’t C without them.
Why did the grad student become a bird watcher? He was trying to research tweets.
Why did the grad student choose linguistics as his major? He couldn’t find anyone to talk to.
Why did the grad student never finish his dissertation on procrastination? It kept getting pushed back.
Why did the grad student cross the road? To get to the finish line.
How do you know when a grad student is stressed? They start acting like undergrads.
Why did the grad student fail his chemistry exam? He thought a mole was an underground animal.
Why did the grad student always wear headphones? To block out the sound of his adviser’s criticism.
How many grad students does it take to change a lightbulb? None, they’re too busy writing their dissertation.
What’s the difference between a grad school party and a funeral? The drinks are the same but the conversations are longer.
Why did the grad student quit their job at the coffee shop? They were tired of working for grounds.
Why did the grad student take up yoga? To learn how to stretch out his deadline.
Why did the grad student fail their literature exam? They were trying to read between the lines.
What do grad students and hurricanes have in common? They both start out strong but fizzle out before they reach the end.
Why did the grad student never leave the library? He found it novel.
What’s the difference between a grad school professor and a prison guard? The prisoners actually get time off.
Why did the grad student refuse to attend the department meet and greet? He was too busy merging his notes.
Why did the grad student become a ghostwriter? They were trying to exorcise their demons.
Up to You!
Congratulations, you made it through all 50+ jokes about grad school!
Whether you’re a current grad student, an alum, or just someone who loves a good laugh (or cringe), you can surely relate to at least a few of these.
But let’s be real, no amount of humor can make up for those sleepless nights, endless readings, and grueling exams.
So take a deep breath, enjoy a well-deserved break, and remember – you’re smarter and stronger than you think.
Because if you can survive grad school, you can survive anything…except maybe a bad joke.
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Hey there, I’m Simon, and I started Jokeslide.com to spread joy and laughter. As a 34-year-old who loves humor, I created this website to share funny jokes and mind-bending riddles in a family-friendly environment. Join me in this laughter-filled journey, connect with others, and experience the magic of humor together! 😄🤝