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50+ Jokes About Eating Too Much On Thanksgiving

Hey there, turkey lovers!

Are you ready to indulge in some serious overeating this Thanksgiving?

If you’re anything like us, you can’t wait to stuff your face with all the mashed potatoes, gravy, and pumpkin pie you can handle – and then some!

But before you dive in, we’ve got a treat for you: 50+ hilarious jokes about the perils of eating too much on Turkey Day.

So grab a napkin (you’re gonna need it) and get ready to laugh your cranberries off!

Jokes About Eating Too Much On Thanksgiving

I ate so much on Thanksgiving, I think I need a stretcher instead of a turkey.

I was so full after Thanksgiving dinner that I had to sleep for two days straight.

I’m pretty sure I ate the turkey, the stuffing, and the gravy all by myself.

If there’s such a thing as a food coma, I’m pretty sure I’m in one right now.

I think I set a new record for the most pumpkin pie slices in one sitting.

My belt is on the last notch and I still feel like a balloon.

I think I need to detox for a month after Thanksgiving dinner.

Can we all agree that stretchy pants should be mandatory on Thanksgiving?

I’m pretty sure I ate my weight in mashed potatoes.

My stomach is protesting so loudly, it could be heard in the next town over.

I’m pretty sure I’m going to need a forklift to get out of this chair.

I’ve officially renamed Thanksgiving to National Stuffing Day.

I think I ate my whole body weight in pumpkin pie and whipped cream.

I tried to eat a salad after Thanksgiving dinner but it just felt wrong.

My family thinks I’m just pretending to be pregnant, but it’s just the effect of turkey and potatoes.

I think I heard my stomach say no more at least a dozen times during Thanksgiving dinner.

I’m pretty sure I could hibernate for the winter after eating so much on Thanksgiving.

I think I broke the world record for the most rolls eaten in one sitting.

Does anyone know a good cardiologist? I think I fried my heart with all the butter on those rolls.

I’m pretty sure I could feed a small village with all the leftovers we have.

Why did the turkey eat so much on Thanksgiving? Because it was stuffed!

What do you call a pilgrim with a big appetite? Christopher Feast-on!

Why did the corn feel lonely on Thanksgiving? Because everyone else was getting mashed!

What did the mashed potatoes say to the pumpkin pie? You’re my best side dish!

What’s the difference between a turkey and a bowling ball? You can’t eat a bowling ball on Thanksgiving!

What do you get when you cross a turkey and a ghost? A poultrygeist!

Why did the cranberries turn red on Thanksgiving? Because they saw the turkey dressing!

What do you call a group of pilgrims who eat too much? The Full-grims!

Why did the football coach go to the bank on Thanksgiving? To get his quarterback stuffing!

What do you get when you combine turkey, stuffing, and mashed potatoes? A Thanksgiving food coma!

Why did the pilgrim call his relatives on Thanksgiving? To wish them a happy gobbler’s day!

What do you call a turkey with a college degree? A bird of knowledge!

Why did the pilgrim throw away his turkey after Thanksgiving dinner? It was already a turkey sandwich in his stomach!

What do you get when you cross a turkey with an onion? A gobbling onion!

Why did the gravy go to the doctor after Thanksgiving dinner? It was feeling saucy!

What did the turkeys say when they got pardoned by the president? We’re winging it on Thanksgiving!

Why did the turkey join a gym after Thanksgiving? To work off his drumsticks!

What do you call a turkey that’s always on the go? A gobble-traveler!

Why did the mashed potatoes get a trophy on Thanksgiving? They were the best in the spud bowl!

What’s the difference between a Thanksgiving turkey and an airplane? One is stuffed with passengers, and the other is packed with stuffing!

I ate so much turkey that I went from being a lean, mean, fighting machine to a lethargic couch potato in a single meal.

I couldn’t help but gobble down more mashed potatoes than I could handle, but thankfully I was able to work it off later in the bathroom.

I went for seconds on the stuffing, and now I’m stuffed like a turkey myself!

I didn’t just eat too much, I practically became a human cornucopia.

My Thanksgiving was sponsored by elastic waistbands.

I ate so much that even the tryptophan couldn’t keep me from staying up all night feeling like I was going to explode.

I may have set a new record for most rolls consumed in one sitting.

I thought I could handle the pumpkin pie, but that sweet, gooey goodness proved to be my downfall.

I went back for thirds on the gravy, but now I’m feeling like a giant gravy boat myself.

I didn’t stop eating until the turkey started complaining about having guests that overstayed their welcome.

I ate so much that I think I inherited a few sequins from my bedazzled tablecloth.

I had a little too much wine with my meal, and now I’m feeling like the mashed potatoes – whipped and a little lumpy.

I ate so much that my scale is going to need therapy.

You know you’ve eaten too much when the dog starts circling you like a vulture.

I had to unbutton my pants just to breathe, but as soon as that pie came out, all bets were off.

I was so full that I started hallucinating, and I swear I saw a gravy boat float across the room.

I think I ate enough for an entire herd of reindeer.

I went for seconds on the candied yams, but now I’m pretty sure my blood type is marshmallow.

I think I found the missing piece of Atlantis – it was in my third helping of green bean casserole.

Congratulations to me for single-handedly keeping the cranberry sauce industry afloat for another year!

Up to You!

So there you have it, my fellow food lovers!

50+ hilarious jokes about how much we all eat on Thanksgiving.

Whether you’re the one who can’t resist seconds (or thirds, or fourths…) or the one rolling their eyes at everyone else’s food comas, these jokes remind us of one thing: no matter how stuffed we are, we can always make room for laughter.

So go ahead, share these jokes at the dinner table or with your virtual gathering, and let the good times roll.

And remember, if you start feeling guilty about all the food you’ve eaten…

you can always work it off…

next year.

Happy Thanksgiving!

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