Yeah, you behind the wheel!
Are you tired of traffic jams and reckless drivers ruining your daily commute?
Well, buckle up and get ready to laugh your gas off with 50+ hilarious jokes about driving!
From bad parking jobs to questionable road signs, we’ve got all the comedic fuel you need to get through the next traffic light.
So, put on your seatbelt and let’s hit the road to gigglesville!
Jokes About Driving
Why do cars make such great comedians? Because they have a ton of mileage!
My car always reminds me of my ex-girlfriend. It’s always breaking down and leaving me stranded.
Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the driver’s license office.
What do you get when you cross a car and a snowman? A freeze-mobile!
How do you know when a driver in front of you is lost? They start using their turn signal at every intersection.
Why did the car go to the gym? To get a muffler!
I was driving the other day and saw a sign that said Drink and drive. I was so confused until I saw it was an ad for a coffee shop.
Why did the car go to the doctor? Because it had a car-buncle!
Just got in a car accident with a clown car. It was no laughing matter.
Did you hear about the car that got into a fight with a bicycle? The car was two tired.
What do you call a first-time driver who’s afraid to get on the highway? The Autobahn-phobic!
A cop pulled me over and said papers. I said scissors and drove off.
Why did the car stop at the windshield wiper store? To get a new wiper snapper!
Why did the ambulance driver completely skip 5 red lights? Because he didn’t want to multi-siren.
Why couldn’t the bicycle stand up by itself? It was two-tired.
How do you turn a sportscar into a minivan? Have three kids and wait ten years.
What do you call a car that can drive on water? A motor-boatmobile!
What do you call it when a car is out of shape? A flabby cabby.
Why did the car go to the dentist? It had a brake ache.
What do you get when you cross a car and a cake? A Traffic-Jam!
What do you get when you cross a pig and a sports car? Road hog!
What do you call a car that’s been stolen? A hijacked!
Why do cars never have their eyes off the road? To stay on track!
What do you call a cow that drives a tractor? A moo-torist!
Why did the car take a break? It needed to oil its wheels!
What do you call a bee that drives a car? A buzz driver!
What did the traffic light say to the car? Don’t look, I’m changing!
What do you get when you cross a car and a snowman? Frostbite!
How do you make a car laugh? Tickle its engine!
Why did the driver wear glasses? Because he couldn’t hear!
What kind of car does a sheep drive? A Lamborghini!
What do you call a car that’s also a phone? A car-cell phone!
How does a mechanic avoid getting lost on the road? By following his own oil tracks!
Why are Formula One drivers not allowed to eat food while driving? Because they might get oil in their stomachs!
What do you call a car that argues with you? An auto-ma-bull!
Why did the truck get pulled over by the cop? Because it was hauling too much a-salt!
What do you call a tire that’s lost its head? A flat-head!
Why did the chicken cross the road in a car? To outrun the other side!
What do you call a driver who’s always angry? A road-rage-aholic!
Why did the driver take the staircase instead of the elevator? Because he was on the wrong floor!
Why did the car cross the road? To get to the tire shop on the other side.
What do you call a car that’s been stolen? A car-napping!
Why did the police charge the person for driving the wrong way on a one-way road? They were taking a shortcut!
Why do bees drive flying cars? To avoid traffic jams!
How many cars does it take to change a light bulb? None, they just drive around it.
What do you call a car that can’t stop sneezing? A Ha-choo Cruiser!
Why did the car refuse to start on a chilly morning? It had a cold engine!
Why did the chicken cross the road in a tiny car? To get to KFC for a quick meal!
Why did the frog take the bus instead of driving its own car? It lost its license because of the jumping in traffic violation!
What do you call a car that never stops complaining? A whine-mobile!
Why did the driver fix his car’s brakes with duct tape? He wanted to stop on a dime – but only had a nickel left!
Why did the man drive his car over the edge of a cliff? He wanted to reach the peak of his life!
Why did the car ask the stoplight to change to green? Because red is so last season!
What do you call a car that is owned by an elephant? A trunk-mobile!
Why did the driver take his car to the car wash on Halloween? To scare the dirt away!
What do you call a car driven by a witch? A broom-mobile!
Why did the traffic ticket get a promotion at work? It made the most money for the city!
What do you call a car that cannot stop talking about itself? Ego-mobile!
Why did the car refuse to start on a hot summer day? It was suffering from overheated emotions!
Why did the car drive off the edge of the cliff? It was chasing its dreams!
Up to You!
Congratulations, my hilarious friend!
You’ve made it through all 50+ jokes about driving.
You’ve zoomed your way through puns, one-liners, and hilarious quips about the joys and sorrows of life behind the wheel.
Whether you’re rolling your eyes at a classic dad joke or chuckling in recognition of your own driving habits, one thing is clear: you’re ready for the road ahead.
So buckle up and enjoy the ride, because with your quick wit and impeccable sense of humor, every trip is guaranteed to be a hilarious adventure.
Here’s to more laughs and fewer traffic jams – you’ve got this!
Want to LOL More?
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Hey there, I’m Simon, and I started Jokeslide.com to spread joy and laughter. As a 34-year-old who loves humor, I created this website to share funny jokes and mind-bending riddles in a family-friendly environment. Join me in this laughter-filled journey, connect with others, and experience the magic of humor together! 😄🤝