Hey there, you animal lover!
If there’s one thing we know for sure, it’s that animals have the power to make us all laugh, no matter what.
From the cat who thinks they’re the boss of your house to the dog who just can’t catch a break, the 50+ best jokes about animals are guaranteed to tickle your funny bone.
So sit back, grab a bag of treats, and get ready to laugh until you howl – because these jokes are the cat’s meow (or the dog’s bark, if you will).
Let’s get started!
Table of Contents
Best Jokes About Animals
Why don’t polar bears get married? Because they always break the ice.
Why don’t oysters donate to charity? Because they’re shellfish.
What do you call a group of cows that play instruments? A moo-sical band.
Why do gorillas have big nostrils? Because they have big fingers.
Why did the duck cross the playground? To get to the other slide.
Why don’t giraffes use elevators? They don’t have the necks-sperience.
What do you call a lazy kangaroo? A pouch potato.
Why did the chicken go to the seance? To talk to the other side.
Why don’t dogs make good dancers? They have two left paws.
What did one flea say to the other flea after a night out? Shall we walk home or take a dog?
How do you know if a sloth is angry? They’re not moving, but they’re flipping you off in their mind.
Why did the sheep go to the doctor? She was feeling a little sheepish.
What do you call a group of sheep singing Christmas songs? Fleece Navidad.
How do you make a tissue dance? Put a little boogey in it.
What do you call a bear with no ears? B.
Why do fish live in salt water? Because pepper water makes them sneeze.
Why does a milking stool only have three legs? Because the cow has the udder.
Why did the koala bear get fired from his job? He kept eating all the eucalyptus.
Why don’t sharks like Twitter? Too many tweets.
What do you get when you cross a snake and a pie? Python.
Why did the chicken cross the playground? To get to the other slide.
Why don’t ducks tell jokes when they fly south? Because they’d quack up.
Why is it hard for a leopard to hide? Because it’s always spotted.
Why did the fish blush? Because it saw the ocean’s bottom.
What’s a bear’s favorite type of cookie? Chocolate chips and grizzly bears.
What do you call a snowman with a six-pack? An abdominal snowman.
Why do elephants never use computers? Because they’re afraid of mice.
What do you call a group of cows who are all playing instruments? A moo-sical band.
What do you call an alligator in a vest? An investigator.
Why don’t you ever see hippos hiding in trees? Because they’re really good at it.
What do you call a bee that can’t make up its mind? A may-bee.
Why did the monkey cross the road? To get to the bANAna store.
What do you get when you cross a snake and a pie? A pie-thon.
Why do you never see elephants hiding in trees? Because they’re too big for them.
How does a penguin build its house? Igloos it together.
Why did the owl invite his friends over to watch a movie? They heard it was a hoot.
What do you call a bear with no ears? A B.
Why did the kangaroo stop hopping? It ran out of gas.
What do you call a camel with three humps? Pregnant.
Why couldn’t the bicycle stand up by itself? Because it was two-tired.
Why did the chicken cross the playground? To get to the other slide.
What do you get when you cross a cat with a lemon? A sourpuss.
Why don’t elephants use computers? Because they’re afraid of the mouse.
What do you call a gorilla that’s good at math? A Math-ape.
Why did the fish blush? Because it saw the ocean’s bottom.
What kind of music do horses listen to? Neigh-sayers.
How does a porcupine say goodbye? With a friendly spike.
Why did the dog go to the vet? It was feeling a little ruff.
How did the skunk feel after being sprayed? Pew-ful, but it got its stink back.
What did the duck say when it bought lipstick? Put it on my bill.
Why don’t lions play cards? Because they’ll always be cheetahs.
How do you make a turtle soup? You have to take it very slow.
Why don’t pandas ever get mad? They eat all their frustration away.
What kind of bird can lift the most weight? A crane.
Why won’t penguins ever steal anything? They always get cold-feet.
What do you call a snake that’s small and cute? Adder-able.
How did the owl get to work every day? By owling a car.
What do rabbits use to keep their fur well-groomed? Hoppins’ conditioner.
How do you catch a squirrel? Climb a tree and act like a nut.
Why did the kangaroo break his phone? He wanted to get a new touch-pouch.
Up to You!
So there you have it – 50+ of the funniest animal jokes around.
From puns to one-liners, we’ve got your animal humor needs covered.
Whether you’re a fan of dad jokes or just looking for a laugh, these jokes are sure to tickle your funny bone.
So keep these jokes in your back pocket for your next zoo visit or animal-themed party.
And remember, if all else fails, just remember that ducks have feathers to cover their butt quacks!
Happy laughing!
Want to LOL More?
Here are other Animals Jokes you’ll enjoy:
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- 50+ Jokes About Turtles
- 50+ Jokes About Octopus
- 50+ Jokes About Zoo Animals
- 50+ Jokes About Cats
- 50+ Jokes About Snow Leopards
- 50+ Jokes About Balloon Animals
- 50+ Jokes About Zoos
- 50+ Short Jokes About Animals
Hey there, I’m Simon, and I started Jokeslide.com to spread joy and laughter. As a 34-year-old who loves humor, I created this website to share funny jokes and mind-bending riddles in a family-friendly environment. Join me in this laughter-filled journey, connect with others, and experience the magic of humor together! 😄🤝